Ella Jardim

Thank the lord it is finally spring here in the city! The other week, we had 3 days of glorious spring, then it got cold again, but now it's back in the 60s! I hope this glorious weather is here to stay because I'm too deep into a spring mindset to turn back now. I really want to prioritize turning my place into an inspiring little haven this season, and Amazon is killing the game right now. 

Clearly, I love pink and like having a feminine space. It just makes me smile from ear to ear when I look up and see pink flowers everywhere. Plus, drinking water out of a beautiful glass truly makes the water taste better. I'm pretty sure it's been scientifically proven... right? Sounds like a study Harvard would conduct if you ask me lol. 

Anyway, this is the first round of home decor I'm treating myself to this season. Although it would be extremely fun to binge shop and get everything on my wishlist at once, that's not the most responsible thing to do, so little by little, I will transform my apartment ... and backyard into an oasis. What's on your home decor wish list this season? 

Shop my favorite finds below

Thanks for taking a moment to read this post. Your support means the world to me, and I hope we can all create an inspiring and tranquil space for ourselves this season. 

Photo by Ellieelien

Disclaimer: the intro to this post is very honest and raw. If you only want to see the positive messages, I recommend scrolling down until you see the first image. We all have days where we can't take in anything other than positive messages, and this post is meant to help anyone who's feeling off, feel less alone. I want everyone who reads this post to walk away feeling inspired or uplifted so take the messages that are right for you and leave the rest. :) 

Do you ever get into a funk where everything just feels kind of meaningless? I'm clearly not a doctor, but it feels quite different from my typical depression episodes. I know for me, I can still experience joy and even random bursts of motivation when I'm in this mood that unfortunately has been visiting me way more than I freaking appreciate. Even when I seek out joy or fun, something still just feels... off, and the joy feels like a distraction from what's really going on beneath the surface. 

Luckily, I have dedicated a lot of time (and freaking money - hello NYC psychology bills) to investing in my mental health. Seeking out help has prepared me for these darker episodes so I always know in the back of my head that just because I'm thinking negative, toxic, self-deprecating thoughts doesn't make them true. And I know that these dark spirals I get into really all stem from the same damn place. Anxiety. 

Anxiety helped our ancestors stay safe from lions or tigers or slave owners who were hunting runaway slaves seeking freedom and asylum (yeah, I went there) because it helped them run away from danger. But living in a constant state of anxiety no-longer serves us because modern society doesn't possess the same sense of continuous, urgent danger that existed for our ancestors. You don't need to take my word for it, I'm just repeating what multiple psychologists and psychiatrists have said about the history of anxiety. 

For me,  hearing this breakdown about anxiety helps me to beat myself up less for feeling this way. It doesn't mean there is something inherently wrong with me or broken about me; it just means this is my brain's fucked up way of trying to keep me safe from the unknown. And the reason I'm being this honest on the internet and painting myself as a pretty little target for anyone to stumble upon and make fun of me for is that I know I'm not the only person who feels like this. The last thing we all need right now is to feel lonelier than we already are. So instead of sinking deeper into a toxic mindset, we are going to pick ourselves up out of our dark spaces (when we are each ready to do so) and take baby steps to get our zest and hope back. 

Tackling anxiety looks different for everyone. It's a long process that can't be fixed overnight. But I think we can all benefit from adding positive messages into our daily routine. It's simple, it's free and maybe it's the stepping stone someone needs to take the next step in their wellness journey. No matter what place you're at in life right now, I hope something in the quotes below resonates with you and helps you smile today. And if you have a beautiful quote you'd like to share, feel free to leave a comment below or DM me on instagram. It would be fun to share everyone's favorite uplifting quotes in a post. Sending you lots of love, and thanks for taking a moment to read this post. Your support means the world to me.

Photo by Priscilla Du Preez

This might sound crazy (or maybe even basic bitch-esque, whatever idgaf), but after getting through all of 2020 and a long-ass, draining January (although we had a few wins - shoutout to Georgia voters and Biden/Harris in the House!!) without a significant other to lean on as an additional support system/intimate connection, I am in this mindset of saying "fuck it! I'm going to build that intimate relationship with myself! I'm going to treat myself like a queen." Embracing the whole self-love club movement that's been sweeping the internet for the past few years has always been somewhat challenging for me. I know that's terrible to admit, but as a natural perfectionist, loving myself when I fail to show up for myself has never been an easy task for me. 

But as I reflect on 2020, it becomes more and more apparent that enjoying the here and now is sooo soo sooo important. And yet, in a year where loneliness, isolation, depression, and the mundane wfh lifestyle have swept the globe, enjoying each day has truly become a hell of a lot harder to to achieve. That's why I'm embracing February, the designated month of love, to dating myself. 

Yep, that's right. I'm officially jumping on the bandwagon. The challenge is pretty simple tbh, each day, I just have to do one small, romantic, indulgent or decadent thing for myself to make my day. Anything that will put a smile on my face and remind me that I'm that bitch. A minimum of 28 things for 28 days. And of course, we are going to do this the frugal way. 

I have a running list of ideas that I'll keep adding to. That way, I'll have a constant bank of inspiration to lean on during the days that I feel burned-out out or just unfulfilled with life. The beauty of this list is that I keep reminding myself that even the smallest things can bring me the highest form of joy. Things like buying myself a beautiful bouquet of flowers from Trader Joes, treating myself to a cute new necklace from Anthropologie, sleeping in satin pjs, and exploring a new, chic cafe just to pick up a delicious dessert are all extremely simple and affordable ways to show me how much I appreciate myself. It takes a lot to show up for ourselves every single day, and we deserve to celebrate that win. 

And I already got a head start this year; I bought myself some beautiful, affordable lingerie and valentine's themed pjs. Then, just to take things up a notch, I found the cutest valentine's day decorative pillows for only $4! Like I said, the smallest things put the largest smile on my face. Here are a few of the things I purchased last week and things I have my eyes on for the next month or so. 

So cheers to a year of making ourselves smile and reaching a whole new level of intimacy with ourselves. I'd love to hear what you're doing to treat yourself this month! Leave a comment or shoot me a DM. It will be fun to keep each other accountable 

My Treat Yo' Self List